A Thought On Christmas

A Thought On Christmas

In many homes at Christmas you will find a Manger scene (Crèche) equipped with Baby Jesus, Angels, Mary, Joseph, Shepherds, Wise men, Camels and I’ve even seen some with cows, though I’m pretty sure that shepherds and cows don’t go together. And for the time being let’s forget that all these people (and heavenly host) weren’t actually together at the same time, there seems to be the thought surrounding this extraordinary event, that all was calm, all was bright. I’ve even heard some say that the stable where Jesus was born was actually better than the Inn (where there was no room), because it was cleaner and God was taking care of everyone by making things a little nicer.
I on the other hand read the story a little different, call me jaded or Scrooge, but I’ve been in a stable and that’s usually not water all over the ground and it seems like a substantial downgrade from the Inn if you were to ask me.

Which brings me to my Christmas thought. If we weigh how much God cares for us by our comfort, then what do you do with this story? Take a look at Joseph for example, first off there is the event itself, Mary’s pregnant but it’s not his! God provides an intense dream that helps to guide his decision not to shame her and no doubt Mary’s character helps with that decision as well, but suddenly Joseph is involved with something bigger than he could ever have imagined. I would guess that the counsel he was getting from friends or family was different from what God told him to do in the dream, and what God asks of Joseph is not easier, in fact it’s harder.
Look how things continue, after Joseph has listened to God and shown extraordinary understanding, some governor wants to tax the people and so Joseph has to take his extremely pregnant “wife” 70 + miles from Nazareth to Bethlehem on a Donkey! (Yeah, imagine that road trip) And the pay off is a stable? But hold on, it’s not over, later on the wise men show up giving them gifts which I’m sure reassured Joseph that he was doing the right thing and all, but before he can even catch his breath he is warned in another dream about Herod wanting to kill the child and the message to Joseph isn’t “don’t worry, I will protect you and the child”, the message is “run for your lives to Egypt”.
I have to confess, right about now I would be thinking, “God, can You just give me a break?” Now, I’m not trying to ruin Christmas; really I just want to preserve the reality of it. Because it’s in the midst of this incredible hardship, that the hand of God is at work, though everything seems to be going wrong, God is moving, guiding and speaking to Joseph, which is an amazing thing if you think about it.
I was wondering, what if Joseph had put Mary away as he had originally thought, and did not listen to God in that dream? He still would have had to travel to Bethlehem and very well may have made it in time to find a nice room at the Inn (after all, a pregnant women can really slow you down). He may have had a nicer room, but I don’t think he would have had as nice of a view as he did in that stable, to witness the single most important event in all of human history, when God became flesh, and walked among us.

So here is my take on the “Christmas” story, even though the whole world seemed to be bent on keeping this event from taking place, God was at work, in the lives of those involved, moving heaven and earth, so He could be with us.

…and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.’” ( Matthew 1:23)

Check out my Slide Show!

That Smile

That Smile

Well the day finally came when we saw our son Samuel, and I must say that all my anticipation did not compare to the actual time we had today. There are so many aspects to this day that I could talk about, but I want to stay focused on his smile. I will not forget when I first spotted him in his platoon, and when Corinne and I yelled out his name and he glanced our way and gave that smirk he gives when he doesn’t want to smile (and believe me he wasn’t supposed to).

The smirk

He looked great; they were about to begin their five-mile motivational run followed by the emblem ceremony and then we would be able to greet and spend what seemed like the quickest five hours with him for lunch and a quick visit. I was aware of a few things in that time, one was how happy he was. Now I would like to think it was just to see us, but I think a lot of it was the fact that he had completed something that he has wanted to do for a long, long time, plus the fact that he would be going home tomorrow. A second thing I noticed was the connection he had with his fellow Marines. I mean here we were, his family who he hadn’t seen in four months, yet he would go out of his way to say hi and congratulate those he spent all this time with, or they would say these little things that only really they found meaning in. It’s not hard to see why, he had just gone through the most intense time of his life with these people which brought a depth and connection that was special between them. I thought how true it is and why we are told to share one another’s burdens, to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice. It brings a deeper growth and bond than probably any other way and it was Jesus’ desire that we be one in John 17. As I was talking with my son over things that stood out to him through boot camp, most of the things he mentioned dealt with the hardship he had to overcome, especially of an event called the Crucible. The word crucible comes from a Latin word having to deal with melting or purifying of metals and really isn’t that what is meant to happen with us in the refining process in our lives as we pursue the Lord? So a life that is blessed (or happy), is a life that is refined. Maybe that is one of the reasons Samuel was so happy, even when he was leaving, going back to more drills and to bed at 9 (still can’t get over that), he said, tomorrow, I go home, with that he walked away, …smiling.

Tomorrow, I go home

Joy

MCRD
(Marine Corp, Recruit Depot)

We arrived at the base around 7:00 after stopping to get a bite to eat. The accommodations are quaint (they're great for 20 bucks a night!) and they have a lot of things here so that the families can enjoy their stay, Corinne and I took a walk around the base for about an hour just looking at where our son has lived for the past 16 weeks and wondering what it's been like for him. Right at 9 o'clock we heard Taps being played which means bedtime for the recruits (imagine, Samuel in bed at 9). It was funny to think that even though we couldn't see him, Samuel was somewhere close by hearing the same thing we were.
Well in less than 12 hours we are going to get to see our son, thank you all who have given such encouraging emails, prayers and emotional support to us, we are grateful beyond words and you have filled our lives with hope and joy through not only Samuel's decision to join the Marines and his time in boot camp, but through all the difficulties in our lives at this time. Your simple Thanksgiving and Christmas blessings, the emails, phone calls and gifts have meant so much to Corinne and I.

Thanks so much for keeping in touch.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow

Well, we’re just about ready to leave for the San Diego area, Corinne Daniel and I are staying at the Marine Base, they have a place for family to stay there. Jordan and Lauren will be joining us later.
We will be seeing Samuel tomorrow and get to have lunch with him as well as spend some of the day with him and then he graduates on Friday and then we get to bring him home.
We found out he is going to be with us and working at the local recruiting office till January 15th, which was great news for us. I don’t know how to put in words what I’m feeling, it’s all over the place, but I will try to journal some of it best as I can. They say it may rain, we’re praying it doesn’t and though the rain may shorten the graduation ceremony, it won’t dampen my spirits of getting to see my son again.

Fingerprints

Fingerprints

Have you ever heard a song that just takes you back? Or maybe certain scenery or fragrances can translate you to a point in time? Funny how we can be moved emotionally by these things, but really, it shouldn’t surprise us, after all it was still us, just some time ago.
This happened to me this past week as I was reminded of a time in my life that I had thought was long gone, but a couple of situations and BAM! There I was in this disturbing time warp, complete with sentiment, heartache and nostalgia. Now usually I just put these events in a little box that I mark “not me anymore” (and thank God I’m definitely not that same person), but I began to think, why am I remembering these things in such a powerful way? And where should this emotional roller coaster be taking me?
One place I don’t want it to take me is back inside the box! Where I live paralyzed to events that are no longer a reality in my present life, but that word reality is really important to me regarding all this, you see the reality is that my life is not separated into boxes of the past or present it is a continuing timeline filled with good, bad, ugly and hopefully redemptive things.
Paul had no problem reminding those who followed Jesus of what they were, he did not put their past in a box, but instead put it before them and said, remember this was you, but it’s not anymore. “Once we, too, were foolish and disobedient. We were misled and became slaves to many lusts and pleasures. Our lives were full of evil and envy, and we hated each other.” Titus 3:3 (NLT)
Paul was just telling the truth, and unless we too are honest with what has and is taking place with us, how can we know if all things have become new, unless we have something like the old to compare it to.
So even though we like to put our life into little compartments, I don’t believe that God’s view of us is like that, just look at how scripture talks about salvation. We look at salvation as an event in a moment of time, but God seems to refer to it as an ongoing process
For we were saved in this hope, but hope that is seen is not hope… Romans 8:24 (NKJV)
For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 1 Corinthians 1:18 (NKJV)
…for now our salvation is nearer than when we first believed. Romans 13:11 (NKJV)
We were saved, are being saved and will be saved, our life is a whole and we will either be able to look at the entirety of it and see God at work, or we will be fragmented and unable to relate to anybody, because we are not living an honest or whole life.
So when I hear that old song, or see that familiar scenery, when the memories come flooding in, instead of trying to put them back in a box, I think I will look and see if I can find somewhere in the memory

...God’s fingerprint on my soul.

Family

November 16th 2007 Part Two

I wrote recently and posted a video of a small gathering that Corinne and I had at our house and how great it was to see everyone again. Well that same night as everyone began to arrive we received word that a video clip of my son Samuel's platoon was posted online, so we raced to the computer and looked it up and carefully watched as face after face panned by. I began to wonder, would I recognize him? When suddenly, there he was, no doubt about it, that's my son.
I can't put into words all that I felt when I saw him, even though the clip only shows him for about two seconds, it meant the world to me. It reminded me that soon we would be seeing him again and I won't go into detail, but it seems there have been a great many changes for the better in his life.
There is a part in the story Jesus told of the prodigal son in Luke 15 where it says "But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him." I have to tell you, I know what it is like to be looking for your son even when he is far off, and hoping to see him again, I understand how everything that was in the past means nothing to the thought of compassion for him and being able to see him, fall on his neck and kiss him.
These emotions became a reality that moved me to tears just seeing him for those two seconds. Oh, and I wasn't the only one who shed a tear that night, many who knew Samuel and saw him on the video were moved to tears as well, and yeah, they were all girls, ...so what's my excuse?

…I'm his father.

For those who would like to see him, Samuel is 4th row second from the right, he appears from 1:06 - 1:08 in the video below.

Friends

November 16th 2007

Corinne and I had wanted to get together with some of the people we had served with in our former college group and so we decided to have a little get together that included food, fun and a great time worshiping together. It was great to see everyone again (miss them so much), and catch up on what's happening in their lives.
Put a little slide show together from the evening.

Facing the real World

Facing the real World

This week I began dog training, very slowly, but a step in a whole new direction. It’s a funny thing to go into a house where you are able to fix the problems they are having, but what’s been eating me is that the problem I am fixing has to do with dogs, not people or their relationships, it’s with peoples pets!
So today as I was home buming a bit, thinking about all this when I received a phone call from someone who let me know that a former friend and co-worker was in the hospital and in very serious condition (It would take too long to go into detail, as his problems go back many years and involve many bad choices).
My friend was surprised and happy to see me and as we began to talk, the gravity of his condition came out. He told me how he’d been in ICU for almost three weeks and was at Loma Linda for almost three months before that, his kidney is failing (he only has one) and because of his drug use and life style, the chances of him getting another transplant are unlikely. His wife has filed for divorce and he had not seen his two children for quite sometime which just added to the overall turmoil he was in.
Now, I will try and clarify what I am about to say in a bit as it may come across rather dark, but the truth is, I would rather have been in that ICU room dealing with all that pain my friend was going through, than in a beautiful house being hailed as a hero for making someone’s dog behave.
You see, as I began to talk with my friend, I was able to bring back into his thoughts the reality of eternity and how temporary all of what WE call “life” is, that he’s not leaving the real world, he’s facing it! He began to cry as we spoke of what really should matter to him most right now, how he, and we all need, forgiveness and grace. He began to talk of his regrets, all that he did wrong and failed to do right. And in his despair I was able to speak to him of God’s unfailing mercy and ability to take and turn around the years that we’ve wasted. I also told him that even in his condition there in ICU, he is still useful to God and those he loves, he can still pray in that hospital bed for his children, and for his marriage, that his prayers can enter eternity and have an impact even after he is gone, that he can still call out to the Lord for strength, wisdom and peace to strengthen the things that remain.
Again through this time, although difficult and sad, I was thankful to be able to be there, thankful to have a part of the eternal work and not just the temporary wag of a tail.
It is worth some thought, when people face death, what matters most of what we call life begins to surface, but we don’t have to wait for that to happen, do we?

Misunderstanding II

Misunderstanding II

John said to Jesus, “Teacher, we saw someone using your name to cast out demons, but we told him to stop because he wasn’t in our group.”” - Mark 9:38
Now what’s wrong with this picture? I mean, I don’t have a lot of experience on casting out demons (don’t want it either), but I’m guessing that casting them out would be a good thing, don’t you? Yet those who knew Jesus best wanted to stop it from happening because the people weren’t following them. I believe there is more to this passage than us just seeing how self absorbed the disciples were with the thought of being leaders. I believe it is to warn us of the very same thing, especially those with a leadership role. I wanted to make the point in my last blog how we can move from a position of authority based on tradition that can blind us from what is being said. It seems that some people are so zealous about what they stand for (like the disciples and who should cast out demons), that they are blind to what actually matters most. Mercy and not sacrifice or religious ritual (Matt. 9:16, Hosea 6:6).
Jesus continues in this account and says “Do not hinder him, for there is no one who will perform a miracle in My name, and be able soon afterward to speak evil of Me. “For he who is not against us is for us. Mark 9:39 - 40
Why are we so quick to take sides against those who don’t see eye to eye with us? Paul didn’t care why Jesus was being preached or even if their motives were to harm him, only that Jesus was being preached (Phil 1:18) We should of course rightly divide and explain the word of truth, but we need to be careful that we do not focus so much on how things are done that we lose sight on what is being done, like casting out a demon! (Which is much worse than the flu by the way).
In my last blog I asked, what does the phrase mean in scripture “the word of God” or to “preach the word?” Well a friend commented back with what I thought was a great answer. “The good news that the LORD God would send His Servant to bear our sins, and that this good news was for all people, and that He would die, be raised and return to establish His Kingdom on this earth is all in Isaiah. These were the Scriptures Paul used to reason with the Jews in the synagogues as he traveled and spread that good news. And Jesus is the Word made flesh, so preaching the Word is preaching Jesus.” - Amen
"In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise," (Eph 1:13).
The word, is the gospel message.

If you answered along those lines give yourself an “A”

Misunderstanding

Misunderstanding

It’s pretty sad how things that used to mean something important lose that significance and value because time and tradition change the original meaning. Take for example the word “church” (ekklesia), which means “called out” in the Greek. Throughout the scripture it refers to a group of people sometimes collectively as a whole and sometimes specifically to an area like Galatia, who are called out and follow the ways and teachings of Jesus, but it never referred to a building. You may think this a little thing, but the meaning of church has become someplace you go to get, instead of something you are to give. I think that difference is huge.
Another misunderstanding is the meaning of the phrase “the word of God” as it appears in much of the New Testament. It has come to mean what we know as the Bible, which is traditioanlly what we've all been taught, but we need to ask a simple question, how could the statement “word of God” refer to something that did not yet exist when the phrase was written? In other words, when Paul wrote “Preach the word” how could he mean the “Bible” (as we have today) when there was no “Bible” yet to preach? Yet I have heard so many quote scripture after scripture using the phrase “word of God” to support how they teach when that’s not what those very verses they quote mean.
Now I have to make this point clear so that people don’t come to the wrong conclusion about what I have just said. I believe that all scripture (the manuscripts that make up both Testaments) is “God Breathed” I believe all scripture is profitable and that Peter gives support that Paul’s writings were to be included in "all" of scripture as written in his epistle. I believe that the Cannon of the New Testament scripture is valid because of it’s preservation and circulation when the church (collective body of Christian believers) was formed. I believe that the scriptures or what is called the Bible is indeed God’s revelation of Himself and His will for all mankind and should be taught completely. In fact I just wrote to a friend and encouraged them to read the scriptures daily for help because I believe that they are the primary way that God speaks to us. What I don’t believe is that it’s ok to pull out a phrase and use it to support the traditions of men usually to exalt yourself above others.
So what does it mean when in scripture when we read phrases like “the word of God” or “preach the word”? Well I think it would be worth finding out, don’t you?
So here’s our homework, look up the phrase word of God (specifically in the New Testament) and see if there is a common theme in the context of the passages that will help our understanding on the subject, I believe it will add a great deal of light and be a help to the church,

...oh, but not the building.

Movies, Society and Finding Our Compass

There were a couple of movies that came out the last few years that received a lot of attention from the “Christian” community. One was The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe from C.S. Lewis’ Narnia Chronicles; the second was The Da Vinci Code from a Dan Brown Novel. Now the attention these two movies received was drastically different, but in retrospect I think the movie that actually opened up more valued conversation for me was the Da Vinci Code, the one that was adverse toward my Christian beliefs. I had some great opportunities to talk to people about the fallacy of all those theories.

So, what’s my point? Maybe we need to change the way we look at things that are contrary to what we believe and instead of feeling threatened by them, see them as opportunities to engage others with what we believe. Take for example the up coming movie “The Golden Compass” If we read and know what the intention of the story is, then we probably know more than most who would see it, which gives us the opportunity to answer any questions that might arise from what is being portrayed. I have never pursued a question about my faith, that hasn’t in the end strengthened my faith, it just takes seeking to find, knocking for the truth to be opened up and asking to get the answer.
All this makes me wonder, how did Christianity spread so quickly throughout the Roman Empire one of the most depraved and hedonistic civilizations the world has known? What was the attitude of those early followers when confronted with opposition to their beliefs? Confronted with the intense idolatry, rampant sexual perversions and complete dishonesty. I mean we never read of Paul saying “get out of Corinth, the place is filled with prostitutes!” He did say run away from the immorality, but he also said, ”…I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin. But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin, or are greedy, or cheat people, or worship idols. You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that.” (1Cor. 5:10 NLT). It seems to me that he is implying that they should expect to find just that type of behavior in the midst of the world they lived in, shouldn’t we?
What would happen if we as followers of Jesus actually followed in His steps or those of Paul? What if we really knew and experienced the transforming work of God in our lives and believed it would do the same for everyone who would have faith in as well? Would we worry less about keeping ourselves “safe” and more about stepping up and into the heart and heat of the conversation?
It’s interesting that the origin of the word “pagan” which has come to mean an unbeliever or heathen, first came from the Latin word which means, country dweller. You see there was a time when the followers of Jesus did not run out of the cities to keep themselves from all the wickedness that was there (Rome being the very heart and epicenter of the know world), but instead remained there until the only ones left who had not heard about Jesus were out in the outskirts, the country, the Pagans. They too like Paul had this idea in their heads that they could actually impact the entire world. And you know what? They did! Their compass, like God’s pointed toward the heart of the world.

… Paul felt compelled by the Spirit to go over to Macedonia and Achaia before going to Jerusalem. “And after that,” he said,

“I must go on to Rome!” (Acts 19:21)

Seeing and Believing

Seeing and Believing

It is hard at times to hold onto hope when everything we see looks so bleak, and though the words from 2 Corinthians “we walk by faith and not by sight” ring true, often they don’t seem to ring NOW, when we want them to. This was brought to mind today when Pastor Jeff Stewart from CC Pomona Valley shared briefly yet beautifully about his wife Karen and her lung cancer and how the scriptures spoke to them when Jesus was in the boat with the disciples during the storm and they cried out to Him, Lord don’t you care what's happening here! Jesus response was “why are you afraid, how is it that you have no faith” Now we all know they should have had confidence in the Lord, after all Jesus was in the boat with them, but we also know all to well the reason why they didn’t have faith don’t we? It was because of all they could see, was literally all that they could see.
Many of you know our son Samuel is at boot camp to become a Marine, what not many know is that he has become a letter-writing maniac! Before going into boot camp I could count on half a hand all the times Samuel had written, but now he has written to both his grandparents (a couple of times), to many of his friends and to us five times. What has been so neat for us is the content of the letters, things like “please pray for me” or, “I went to church again” or our favorite “I miss you and can’t wait to see you” The reason I mention his letters is not merely to brag about our son, who in just a few months time has become a family hero (especially to the grandparents), I write it to make the point that, what we never could have seen or imagined a few months ago is today a reality written and right in front of us. So then, what is it that you are having trouble seeing? Is it the restoration of a relationship? Is it the return of a wayward child? Remember just because you don’t see it does not mean that it is not there, and even if the situation does not work out the way you would think best, Jesus is still in the boat or maybe more fitting to your situation like Paul when he was alone in prison, it says “But the following night the Lord stood by him” (Acts 23:11) You may not see Him there, but who are you going to believe? Jesus,

...or what it is you think you see?

Changes

Changes

I am going to make some pretty big changes regarding my traveling both to Sacramento for the dog training and to lead the studies up in St. Helena.
As I have shared before it has been difficult driving back and forth. I don’t want to come across complaining or say this to make anyone feel sorry for me, I actually share this in my weakness, I have had quite a bit of internal turmoil regarding this.
I’ve been praying since early July, wondering whether St. Helena is really where the Lord is leading my family and me, or am I pursuing this merely because I have no other choices? My thoughts have been that if the Lord is not leading me in this direction, then will I now end up doing nothing? So then, would I rather do something, than nothing? But then again, would I rather do nothing than something that the Lord is not leading in? Anyway, I hope that conveys some of my mental and emotional struggles.

Again it is in my weakness I humbly admit that I sought and needed counsel, and so I spoke to a pastor who I prayed and believed could help me sort through some of these things without the emotional baggage.
My time with him was clarifying and very healing; as a result of our time I will not be going up to St. Helena for at least the next two months and also cutting back on the dog training. He shared (and I believe it wise) that I needed to spend less time running around trying to make something happen because of fear or worry and more time seeking the Lord for direction, and confirming peace. That it’s hard to hear the Lord’s still small voice when you don’t take the time to be still and your own head is screaming so loud.


Now, I would like to try and make this helpful to others and not just a state of my psychotic affairs. I believe this is true in so many areas of our lives, we often feel we must do something and so that’s exactly what we do, “something”, not necessarily the “right” thing. And though I believe it’s easier for God to steer our lives when they're moving, maybe like me you too forget that waiting on the Lord is actually forward movement, and that praying is really very progressive.
Finally I have to say how blessed I was that as I shared these things with Pastor Bill in Napa and with some of the individuals in St. Helena, they not only understood and sympathized with my situation, but encouraged me in it as well. Which I found extremely comforting, but also very difficult, because really, who wouldn’t want to be with people like that?

I beg for your prayers during this time, that Corinne and I would hear, know and not shrink back from the Lords leading.

Let It Rain

Repost from March 18, 2006

Let It Rain

Have you ever at the end of one those days or maybe weeks wondered "why am I doing all this?" I'm tired, overwhelmed with thoughts and things I need to get done, and for what!? That's what I was thinking last night (more accurately that morning) as I was trying to put some thoughts into my memory for the night's e3. Why am I doing this? Who cares and what difference is it going to make?




It was raining again; in fact a friend asked me "why do you think it keeps raining on Friday's? My response was, "rain is good, it cleanses things we can't see," I was thinking specifically of my attitude. We still had about 30 people come out in spite of the rain and all, but will I continue to do what I believe God wants me to do even if it's a battle and it rains every Friday? Add to the mix a week full of frustrating situations that I have no power over, praying for people who are seriously ill, counseling appointments that just make you cry afterwards, a women who already has had to give up 3 of her children because of bad choices made, who is pregnant again, and figures it best to just have an abortion "this time". Inside I'm screaming it would be best if you would just... sorry, my thoughts weren't kind, and my heart is broken for those kids and her continued bad choices.

A constant fear of mine is that one day I will look back on my life and all the things I have done, with the thought that it made no difference, all that I did was just a waste of time, a waste of life.
After tonight's meeting a couple of people talked with me about some of the things I said and then there was one... a girl who believes she heard from God through the things I shared, a confirmation to something that had been heavy on her heart and mind, she was in tears believing that God spoke to her and so we prayed that God would continue to guide her steps of faith and obedience.
You know, it really doesn't matter what things I accomplish in my life, what really matters is what God accomplishes in the lives of other through me.

I felt better after that, in fact even though I was a bit tired Corinne and I went with a group to grab a bite to eat afterwards, it was a good night.
and as far as next week,

... let it rain

A Day Is as a Thousand Years

A Day Is as a Thousand Years

Well the two days that I spent up in Sacramento were interesting and a little frustrating. I was hoping to get maybe five training lessons in during that time, but ended up with only two because of the weather. On my way back down I was thinking how the rain affects us all, both in good ways (farmers) and in bad (outdoor dog training!). I left for home right after the second lesson around 8:30 and was hoping to make it back by 1:30 or 2 a.m., but the rain came into play and slowed things down quite a bit. That was nothing though compared to the Armageddon that took place on the I-5 involving 28 commercial vehicles and one passenger car and totally shut down two freeways as well as tragically taking 3 lives.

When I came upon the accident I was stuck in between two exits and so it took me almost 2 hours just to exit the Fwy. and another two to make it home finally at around 5 a.m.
It struck me as kind of ironic that my last blog talked about Joseph and Mary’s excursion to Bethlehem and getting over the walls in our lives while here I was on my own excursion to make it home to Upland facing a wall of red lights. I can’t tell you how difficult those last few hours were, and how long those two days seemed (thus the title in jest). I did wonder though what God wanted to do in or with my life at that time and I had plenty of it to think. It also reminded me of a time before when I was questioning the rain and God’s hand in all of these kinds of things. I posted a blog about it and may repost it if I can find it.

On a good note, I led worship at CC Montebello today and although it was 4 services and I had to wake up way early it was great and refreshing leading them (boy those people will sing whether you’re there or not), and it was way kewl to be in front and listen to them all. Singing has a way of pouring out our souls to God and He will never be outdone, He will always pour more into us.
Next week and weekend I am going back up to Sacramento and then St. Helena, appreciate your prayers as this last wall really took a lot out of me.

Blessings,
Sam

I cry out to the LORD;
I plead for the LORD’s mercy.
I pour out my complaints before him
and tell him all my troubles.
When I am overwhelmed,
You alone know the way I should turn.
Wherever I go … Psalm 142

When God Builds a Wall

You may have heard the saying when God closes a door He opens a window, it sounds nice and is something we like to read in our little box of promises, but in my expierience sometime the door closes and there is no window in sight, in fact sometimes it seems as if God closes a door and builds a wall!
I think the difficult thing for us to understand (at least for me) is that my circumstances (and by that i mean my comfort) are really no way to determine if God is at work or not. I mean imagine if Mary and Joseph used their circumstances to determine if God was at work in their lives or not? Here they are on their way to Bethlehem in the last days of Mary's pregnancy (riding on a donkey no less) all because some hedonistic king wants to take a census so he can get more money. Do you think that maybe they were feeling a little stressed out? I know in that circumstance I would be wondering "ok God where's the window that my promise book talked about?"

It is only because in retrospect that we understand God was orchestrating all of mankind to bring about the most incredible event that would ever take place in human history, that the Word would become flesh and dwell among us, but i bet you a million to one Joseph and Mary weren't feeling the love at that moment.

What drives people to keep moving forward in faith? It's definitely not circumstances, maybe it's perseverance in spite of they we see, or fail to see. In 1 Samuel14:13 it speaks of Jonathan and his armor bearer climbing up, using their hands and feet to engage the Philistine army. Now why is that verse in the Scriptures? If he was climbing what else would he use besides his hands and feet? Maybe the same way Jonathan climbed the mountain and Joseph walked to bethlehem is also the way we get past the wall in front of us. So when it seems like God has closed the door and put up a wall, you can wait for a window, or you can use your hands and feet

...and get over it

Just Two Days

Just Two days
I really don't want to, but I'm going to be heading back up to Sacramento tomorrow morning for a coupel of days. Chris who is one of the trainers has a couple of lessons already scheduled that she said would be great for me, they are with aggressive dogs so it should be exciting. I hope to leave early in the morning and get back early, early Saturday morning. I keep telling myself it's just two days.
Well glad to report that Lauren passed her drivers test and is now an official licensed driver (just a word of warning). I also am supposed to get my toyota Camry back next week (boy that's a whole story in itself).

Would appreciate the prayer for my family and me the next two days. Jordan and Daniel are still home so that's comforting to me, and again, it's just two days

...and about 900 miles ha-ha

Update on friends son Dan

Some of you know about my friends son who has cancer, I wanted to post this update and ask that all of you continue to pray for Dan. Please pray as if this were your own son, brother or loved one and realize that a mother and fathers heart are tied to this young man, so should ours be who are his spiritual family.
"And if one member suffers all the members suffer with it" - 1 Cor. 12:26

From Dan's blog...

So I don't know the last time I blogged... but here goes. I told you in my status I would write about the good news, and now it is coming.

As of tomorrow the 7th, I will have been on chemo for three months (minus a week where I had a break, which was nice) but I did start on 7/7/07. Nice, huh. Well, the good news (aside from me handling the last two treatments (3&4) very well) is I had a PET scan on the 27th of September. I last had a PET scan on July 28th, and my mom took the new scan home and compared it with the old one. Anyway, she called me, and was crying, saying she was looking at my scan... thanks, mom. My dad took the phone, told me it was good news, and my mom was just being emotional.

Basically, in the first scan, my liver was filled with tumors, forcing it all the way across my abdomen. The new scan showed my liver at about 3/4 of the way across my abdomen, which is normal. So they're shrinkin. :D ALSO, in the first scan, they were lighting up a lot, meaning they were metabolically more active than a sugar-loaded 6 year-old. Second scan: they look as active as an octegenarian couch potato. So that's hot. Praise the Lord, faithful like none other.
I didn't want to write until now, because yesterday was when I found out what was happening next. I got chemo again (round 5) and in three weeks, I will have round 6. After that, I will have a CT scan (which better shows size, as PET shows activity better) to check out the size of those little buggers, and see what to do from there. And with the fantastic combination of me tolerating the chemo well plus the chemo kicking those tumors bununus (buttockses in Hume Lake-ish), I think those tumors could be gone soon.

Thanks to all who have prayed at least once, thanks to all those who prayed daily, thanks to God the Almighty of the universe! I'll admit it's a lot easier to say that when things are going well. But it is more powerful to say it when things are poopy. You know? 'I feel like crap, but praise God anyway, because, quite frankly, He's God.' Wow.

Another thing I remembered upon a pondering moment... I remember being frustrated (kinda) that I didn't have a cool testimony. Nothing like, 'I was on the streets addicted to crack' or 'I turned to God when I was about to kill myself'. More like, 'I was born on a Tuesday and in church on Sunday'. Woohoo. But now, God has decided to let me have a testimony more interesting than I've had before. I had a strange form of a rare cancer, random crap happened to my body all the time, and yet, the peace of Christ saturated my soul through it all. He was there through it all, as He had been when I was a healthy, boring-testimonied person. How bout that, huh? God is awesome. Amen.

Sept. / Oct.

Sept. Oct. the uttermost parts of the world

It's been pretty busy lately and I haven't had an internet signal available till now. I'm hijacking someone's wifi signal (thank you whoever you are, I promise not to black hole all the band width.)

I went up to Roseville Wed. afternoon for the dog training and was able to work in four different training sessions, including one where I actually took the leash! I have been staying at the business owners place for three days and then met Corinne, Lauren, Alyssa along with my cousin and others in Davis last night (Friday) for dinner. After dinner Corinne and the girls had to find an Urgent care somewhere in Sacramento because Lauren has an ear infection or something and is in a lot of pain. I came up here to Napa and the girls made it in later.

I've had a couple of conversations this week that have got me thinking. The first was when I was asked if I thought that a persons life could be blessed if they had no children. The reason they asked was because once at church he heard that if you had children you were blessed and so he assumed that because he didn't, that somehow he wasn't. What really got to me was that he wished he had a family, but felt now it's too late.

Imagine living with the thought that no matter what you do, the rest of your life will be less than what it should be. I think a lot of people feel this way with a lot of situations and for a lot of reasons. I shared with him that there are many people who don't have children or who have even lost children that are still blessed. I told him not to dwell on what you can't change, but on what you can.

The second conversation was over lunch after a lesson, the trainer and O were talking about the changes that take place in our lives and the importance of not thinking so much of ourselves to the point where we make others a convenience for our needs and have little or no regard for them, their feelings or their needs. When she dropped me off at my truck she asked me where the church i was pasturing was at. I told her no where right now, that's one of the reasons why I'm dog training. She very kindly added that if I started a church in their area that she would go and bring her whole family. Wow, i thought, that was easy, all i had to do was listen and share a little of what the scriptures teach and the Lord faithfully fills in the needs.

Both these conversations stirred in me some of the things I have been studying for the services I'm teaching this Sunday in Acts. There is such a need in every community for people to be what Jesus told us we are to be in Acts chapter one, "witnesses". Erwin Mc Mannus explains it as "proof" of God, and that the smallest denomination that God measured for the disciples was not people, families or small towns, but whole cities, like Jerusalem, Judea and eventually the entire world.

So maybe once again I am thinking to small, maybe the Lord doesn't want me to talk to a few people, maybe He wants something more from all of us, maybe He wants us to affect whole communities and not just one, but a whole bunch of them. I have at least three in my mind right now, anyone up for a challenge? Definitely going to need a couple of add shots for this one.

... and from reading Acts, i don't think caffeine is enough.

September Update

September Update

The dog training has been really slow down here; in fact it hasn’t happened at all. I almost went out on one call, but the company owner called me and said he didn’t care for the trainer I was supposed to go out with, and would rather I didn’t go. So… he’s the boss and I didn’t go. Hopefully things will change here soon, but until then it looks like I will be doing more traveling up to Sacramento which is kind of a bummer.

We have heard from our son Samuel (who left for the Marines on 9-11-07) three times now, which is somewhat of a miracle if you know Samuel at all. He’s written once to grandparents and twice to us. Of course it’s been good to hear from him and we have been encouraged that he has gone to the church service twice and is asking for us to please pray for him as he has a cough and does not want to get pneumonia, so please pray with us for this.

Corinne and I will be going to Jeff’s mom’s memorial service tomorrow up in Ventura and then I will be continuing my way to the Valley for the weekend and Corinne will head back home. Next week it looks like I will be going up to Sacramento on Wednesday for the dog training, Corinne Lauren and Alyssa will pick me up sometime Friday and the four of us will then go up Valley for the Rock of Ages festival and the Sunday services in Napa and St. Helena.

It has been a bit strange for us in that it feels as if we are somewhat living in two worlds (Northern and Southern CA), yet not entirely living in either one. It is mentally fatiguing and we keep getting dates mixed up and are constantly dependant on Outlook to let us know what is planned. I recently purchased a laptop (which was supposed to arrive today), this will help me when I am away with my studies.. I had hoped to get it up and running before this weekend, but doesn’t look like that’s going to happen, maybe by next week.

I can’t tell you how we appreciate all the prayer, support (helped buy the laptop) and encouragement that all of you have given to us, you have no idea how timely it has been and how it has lifted our spirits. Thank you sooooooo much.

Much love,
Sam & Corinne

Something About Friends

Something About Friends

As I have been home the past two weeks as opposed to traveling up north for the dog training and teaching in St. Helena, it has been nice staying in my own home and sleeping in my own bed. Another nice thing has been the meetings I have had with friends. There were two get together this week, one was with those who have been with me on worship teams over the years and the other was for a couple of great guys who were up for a short time from Vizcano Mexico.
Its funny how we get used to things, like our favorite pillow or restaurant, it’s comforting having a familiarity that takes away the apprehension of uncertainty. For example whenever I go out to eat at the Macaroni grill, I always order the Shrimp Portofino. Now I have tried a lot of other dishes, but that one has always stood out above the others for me. So whenever I go there to eat (which is not very often), and everyone around is looking at their menu wondering, I just sit back eat all the bread because I already know what I want, and it is something I have always enjoy.

There is a similar familiarity with my friends and it’s a good thing. I’ve know some of them for years, and others not as long, but I have enjoyed the time with them so much, it has been rich, warm, and refreshing. Some of my friends have poured out their hearts to me, and I too have been able to open my soul to some of them as well. There is a comfort knowing that I am with people I know and who know me, and even though some of them know me very well, they still seem to like me anyway.

Love is an unusual commodity, I really believe it is limitless. When Corinne and I had our first kids (the twins) I could not believe how my heart grew in love for these two boys and when our third son and then daughter were born, I never had to divide the love I had for the first two and now split it 4 ways, my heart just continued to grow more and more. The problem isn’t that there is not enough love; the problem is there isn’t enough time. Which is why I like spending time with those I love and which is why it was so nice to see everyone together these two times, it was like going to all my favorite restaurants and getting to order my favorite meal from each

… and still have room for desert.

May the Lord make your love for one another and for all people grow and overflow, just as our love for you overflows. – 1 Thes. 3:13

Starting Over

Starting Over

Sept. 15, 2007
Well I am up in Roseville right now which is by Sacramento and then off to St. Helena tomorrow afternoon. Today as I was on another "ride-along" for a dog training lesson, the trainer I was riding along with asked me why I wanted to start learning how to train dogs? I have to confess my first thought was not a happy one, it had to do with the word "start" and starting over.

There is always this feeling I get when I am starting a new line of work (and I've done this quite a bit). It's this humbling "I don't know what I'm doing can you please help me?" feeling.The second thing I thought was a bit better, it was that the only real reason I am doing this, or anything I've done the past 20+ years, Is so I can make a living to provide for my family and that will allow me to continue to tell people this great news about who Jesus really is. Now I didn't put it in those words when I told the trainer I was riding along with, but I did get to tell her how this is what I really love to do. Bottom line, I want to live for Jesus "full time" and any 40 hour a week part time job that helps me do that is ok with me. Besides, it's good to be humbled now and then,

...it helps me with my full time job.

Helpless to Remember

Helpless to Remember

I am helpless remembering so many things effecting how I feel right now. Memories of my son Samuel that are so precious to me, the spontaneous "I love you dads", the great bear hugs and kisses, or the times when we would have heart to heart talks about everything from toys to what happens after you die. I could go on and on with the things that warm my heart and are making my eyes well up with tears, but there is one story I do want to share that means a lot to me right now.
I was supposed to go to Las Vegas with a client for a wood working convention back in 1999, but they at the last minuet couldn't go so instead of going to Vegas by myself, I decided to take Samuel with me. I had a great room at the Luxor hotel, and already made reservations for dinner at Mid-Evil times, so my son and I got to enjoy the benefits of my works generosity for a couple of nights.
After our dinner we went walking down the blvd. looking at all the hotels, the fountains, enjoying some of the rides and entertainment. As we went along from hotel to hotel, my son would take and hold my hand. I could see he was having a great time by how his face lit up and by the sparkle in his eyes. I didn't mention it, but Samuel was 13 years old at the time.



Let me ask you a question, how many 13 year old boys would on their own choose to hold their dad's hand while they were walking out in public? Well Samuel did! All night long from place to place he would take my hand, ask me questions, wonder what we were going to do next. I remember one guy walked past us and looked at me rather strange that I was holding this 13 year olds hand and I almost let go worrying what some people might think, but a voice inside me stood firm and said "don't you dare loose this moment!" In fact it was then that I realized what an incredible moment it was, and what a great son I had.
Well Samuel is off to the Marine Corps for the next five years, please pray for the safety of his heart, soul and body, I can't begin to tell you what he means to me, but I know I will never forget. I also can't imagine what he means to God, who knows his full potential and I have great comfort knowing that He will not forget Samuel as well.

A Heart of Flesh

A Heart of Flesh

In Ezekiel, twice God mentions that He will gather a people and give them a heart of flesh and remove their hearts of stone. Now at first that doesn't seem like much of an improvement to me, I mean, a heart of flesh? I already have one of those, don't I? Couldn't He give me an upgrade to like a heart of titanium or something?







Apparently to God, for some reason a heart of flesh, a heart that is vulnerable to its surroundings is of greater value than a heart which cannot be affected by God or people.
After our recent trip from Swansea one of the members from our team called and left me a message on my phone, they were obviously distraught and when I returned their call, they were barley able to hold back the tears and emotion. I wondered what had happened and of course imagined the worst, but as they began to tell me what was going on I recognized what was taking place, because it had happened to me before as well. They had been wounded by God

Now when I say wounded by God most of the time we think it a bad thing, like getting dumped by your girlfriend (or boyfriend), but being wounded by God is completely different in that the wounds that He inflicts makes you more in love, not less, makes you want to be more vulnerable, not less. What in fact is happening is that the wounding is breaking away the stone, the selfishness, the lack of caring and in turn it is giving you a heart of flesh and it is only in contrast that you see how before it was a stone. My friend had come to realized after giving of themselves in effort, time and emotion how much they truly cared and being away from the people as well as that concentrated work of God broke their heart.

That is the trouble with a heart of flesh; it can be broken, wounded and ruined,
...ruined by a love that is more, not less.

Significance

Significance

What makes something significant or of importance to us? It seems that whether its clothes, music or people, what makes things significant is how we connect with them. Clothes may be comfortable or make us look thinner, music connects to our emotions or relates to our life, but people, well this is where I think we need to be careful.





I find the parable Jesus told about the Good Samaritan to be very revealing to our nature as human beings. Here was a person who chose to take care of not only a stranger but the context is also of someone to whom there were strong social prejudices against. Yet in the story this Samaritan treated the stranger with extreme kindness, with a significant cost to himself.
It may surprise you but some people when asked if both your favorite pet and a stranger were drowning and you could only rescue one, which would you save? Surprisingly some have said they would save their pets above the stranger. Now put in that actual situation I pray that a deeper reason would prevail, but it is alarming to think to some it might not.

It seems to me we may need to rethink what we hold important when it comes to people. Do we think people are a comodity and important because of how they affect us? Like clothes, music or food? Or is it because of their importance to God? If our measure is solely about us, then we too will rescue our favorite pet over a human stranger, but if "man" was truly created in the image of God, then people are of value not because of OUR relationship to them, but because of their relationship to God.

… I think that is very significant